it's not about being in control

Steve Morozumi for fluxlife

it's about being willing to understand what is going on with the self, another person and/or event. and then willing to understand any automatic behavior response that may be happening on your part (esp. delusion, hate, or greed (see the Zen Dot Studio blog)). part of the theme for this fluxlife blog post is also reflected in a bumper sticker over at The Humble Yogini blog. little bit o' synchronicity goin' on. :)

it's about being willing to adapt based on knowledge of the authentic self and others' authentic selves. the authentic self is from whence we came: the divine. and this is what we truly are, but we often spend our lifetime layering over this with other things and covering up our true divine origins.

find out as much as you're able on the externals (people, place, & thing(s)) of something you're grappling with, then get curious about how you're playing out in the story. do you have delusion, hate, or greed going on with yourself? if it's fear, i just got some great advice from Dr. Wayne Dyer: "Get curious about your fear of something. Shift from fear (to something more productive)." When you look into the fear at hand, instead of skipping over it, or becoming more scared of it: you'll find out where you're at with it. has this type of reaction happened before? what is going on inside of you that's causing you to play your role in this situation as you are? do you wish to change your roll from reacting (vs. acting), or are you doing relatively okay as you are? how are other people in this experience relating to you? how are you relating to yourself?

afraid, or having some negative reaction to something? GET CURIOUS about it. look into it. ask yourself some questions. you will find some insight, and it will help you. if you feel that you have no questions to ask, find someone who can help you get curious about your fear, hate, delusion, lack of patience, greed, anger or challenging relationship or situation.

now if i can just take my own advice, i should be rockin' it in 2009 (hahaha)!

" inhale positivity " by Lazy Boy

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Kylie w Warszawie said...

This is fabulous advice about fear. Where is it taking us?

And if I'm ever in San Francisco I will look you up:). Thanks for the offer. Now, I have to mention that in my adult life I have been only to California once and that was San Diego for my BIL's graduation from MCRD.

Steve Morozumi said...

glad you liked the fear advice. maybe if Bill ever has a reunion in San Diego you all might be able to swing by SF? :D

sjdinergrrrl said...

well i haven;t really been exposed to zen, or i've chosen not being exposed to zen, and i stay away from all "self-help" stuff, which i think the Dyer guy is about, but somehow along the way i have figured out that when i am having a negagtive experience in any situation, it is usually my own fear generating my reaction. really there is so little in life one has control over. which generates more fear. catch-22,snake eats tail, vicious circle. human condition. maybe i'm a buddist at heart?
ggod post steve, and thanks for yiur positive response to my blog, its nice to know somebody out there gets it. de la pinche

ZenDotStudio said...

Great piece. I love the advice about being curious, it lends a lightness to looking at ourselves. It reminds me of the idea of regarding life as an experiment. Again for me it takes the pressure off.

Also to sjdinergrrrl, I think you're right you are a Buddhist at heart! One of the major tenets of Buddhism is that we are not in control.

Just a side to Steve, to let you know I did send you an email. No pressure to respond but let me know if you didn't get it. Those spam filters can get busy sometimes! Carole

Steve Morozumi said...

sjdinergrrrl, your blog is candid, interesting, and i like the style of it! i agree with ZenDotStudio, you're a Buddhist at heart.

ZenDotStudio, glad you liked the GET CURIOUS technique of looking at fear and other emotions. thanks for the email!, i sent one back to you and Janaki.

Janaki said...

Brilliant! 'Getting Curious' is a great way to start the fear exploration. In Vedanta we say that fear is an expression of a lack of knowledge of the True Self(same as authentic self). We say instead of spending so much time trying to get to know others why not spend time getting to know your True Self;-)